you will never understand what i'm going through now
♥ shan 杉 signed off at 3:47 PM

这不会影响我，希望也不会影响你
所以这事对我来说就到此为止
这样的平静不好吗?
我不用对任何人交代，解释
因为我相信自己已足够了
谢谢你。

让我从头开始的机会在眼前
我是不会放弃的
但是，我不要你们介入这难堪的局面
所有的压力与困难由我一人承担
说不出，看不出，但实在的，这对我来说是重要的。

我伤得很重。

i never thought how largely this would affect me, and affect my thought and emotions.
i never realised the importance of this whole issue.
i never realised i would have to make a choice one day.
however, i thank skies alot that i do not have to make this decision now, cos if i did, i'll never be able to pull myself together again.

as for the other one, im not going to give a hoot anymore. i have better stuff to do and focus on than to take part in ridiculous quarrels that i have no idea what it's about.

everything's collapsing at the same time.
you wanted to know, but i couldnt find a right way to tell.
im sorry, but some things just cannot be said easily, neither can they be solved easily.
it's pretty easy to say "cheer up cheer up" but it's not easy to really do so.
for the sake of others, i wont show it anymore.
it's different somehow.

it's a wake up call for me.
treasuring all that i have now, before they are taken away one by one.

Y